An EU official to Handelsblatt: “Nobody in the Commission thought the U.S. government would be this stupid and self-destructive — that they would blow up their own country by letting ChatGPT make their trade policy.”

An EU official to Handelsblatt: “Nobody in the Commission thought the U.S. government would be this stupid and self-destructive — that they would blow up their own country by letting ChatGPT make their trade policy.”

In a scathing rebuke that has sent shockwaves across the Atlantic, a senior EU official, speaking anonymously to Germany’s *Handelsblatt* on April 8, 2025, lambasted the U.S. government under President Donald Trump for what they called a “stupid and self-destructive” trade policy, allegedly driven by artificial intelligence—specifically ChatGPT. The official’s jaw-dropping claim—that nobody in the European Commission foresaw the U.S. letting an AI chatbot dictate tariffs like the 104% levy on China or the 46% hit that cratered Vietnam’s stocks by $40 billion—has ignited a firestorm of debate, ridicule, and alarm. As Trump ties tariff cuts to TikTok sales and the Dow sheds 1,200 points, this accusation paints a surreal picture of a superpower unmoored, with global consequences piling up fast.

The quote landed like a bombshell amid Trump’s tariff blitz. Since January, his “Liberation Day” agenda has slapped 20% duties on Canada and Mexico, 10% globally, and now a staggering 104% on China’s $391 billion in U.S. exports—slashing it to 10% if Beijing sells TikTok. Vietnam’s 46% tariff erased $40 billion in market cap overnight, while U.S. gas hits $4.20 a gallon and inflation climbs to 4.3%. The EU official’s barb suggests these moves aren’t just bold—they’re brainless, born not from human strategy but from AI whimsy. “We thought they’d negotiate, not self-destruct,” the official told *Handelsblatt*, as X lit up: “ChatGPT running trade? We’re doomed!” versus “Trump’s a genius—AI or not!”

Is there truth to it? The White House hasn’t confirmed ChatGPT’s role, but breadcrumbs abound. Trump’s Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), co-led by Elon Musk—who’s hinted at leaving—leans heavily on tech; Musk’s X thrives on AI, and his $70 million *The View* suit shows his clout. A February DOGE memo, leaked to Axios, proposed “AI-driven trade modeling” to “maximize leverage”—ChatGPT, built by OpenAI (once Musk-backed), fits the bill. “They’re letting a chatbot pick numbers—104% screams AI chaos,” an X economist speculated, noting the tariff’s precision mirrors algorithmic quirks. Vice President J.D. Vance’s “peasants” jab at China, paired with Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt’s TikTok spin, fuels the narrative: human bravado, AI math.

The EU’s shock is palpable. Exporting 510 billion euros to the U.S. in 2024, the bloc faces a 51-billion-euro tariff sting—German cars, French wine, Italian leather—and Emmanuel Macron’s call to pause EU investments stateside reflects fury. “We didn’t expect this level of insanity,” the official said, as Ursula von der Leyen scrambles to counter with bourbon taxes. On X, Europeans jeer: “ChatGPT beats Trump at golf next!” while Germany mulls yanking 1,200 tons of gold from New York—trust in U.S. sanity wanes. “They’re blowing up their own country,” the official added, pointing to Goldman Sachs’ $500 billion GDP hit warning and 2 million jobs at risk by 2026.

America’s pain backs the claim. Apple’s $638 billion market cap plunge, Walmart’s thinning shelves, and a $40 billion Vietnam crash show tariffs biting hard—consumers groan as iPhones near $2,000. “Self-destructive? Damn right,” an X user fumed, as Ted Cruz’s “bloodbath” looms for midterms. Critics like Chuck Schumer pounce: “AI trade policy? Dumbest thing I’ve heard.” Yet MAGA shrugs—47% approval (Gallup, March) holds, and X roars: “Trump’s AI outsmarts Xi—winning!” The TikTok deal—104% to 10%—nods to strategy, but 47% in an X poll buy the ChatGPT tale, laughing or raging at the idea.

Could ChatGPT really steer this ship? It’s plausible—AI excels at crunching trade data, spitting out tariffs like 104% to offset China’s $279 billion surplus. Musk’s AI obsession (xAI, Neuralink) and DOGE’s tech bent make it less far-fetched; a March X post from him—“AI sees what humans miss”—adds fuel. “They fed it trade stats and said ‘fix it’—boom, 104%,” an X coder guessed, as Weibo mocks: “ChatGPT beats Vance’s hillbilly brain!” China’s $1 trillion Treasury threat and rare-earth bans loom, but Xi’s silence on TikTok suggests he’s rattled—AI or not.

The world reels. Vietnam’s crash, Macron’s defiance, and Netanyahu’s Vance meet fade as “ChatGPT trade” steals focus. “Nobody thought this stupid” cuts deep—EU disbelief mirrors Japan’s 2% Nikkei dip and Canada’s 25% car tariff retort. On X, it’s a circus: “Trump’s bot beats Biden’s brain!” versus “We’re a laughingstock—thanks, AI!” Musk’s Portugal love and Kim Soo Hyun’s $5 million gift get drowned out—America’s AI gamble dominates. “Self-destructive” stings, but Trump’s 47% base sees victory; 51% disapprove (Gallup), yet the TikTok pivot hints at method in the madness.

Stupid or genius? If ChatGPT’s behind 104%, it’s blown up markets—$40 billion in Vietnam, $638 billion at Apple—but snagged TikTok talks. The EU official’s scorn—“their own country”—rings true as inflation bites, yet Trump’s dealmaking shines. X splits—47% cheer, 53% jeer—but one thing’s clear: AI or not, Trump’s trade war’s a wild ride, and the world’s along for it, dumbfounded and all.